How to Sell Yourself For Money

Today was fun. I was sitting at my computer wondering where I was going to make some money, because Lynchburg has decided not to hire college students. Thanks. I decided to take a nap.

While laying there, I realized that I could make money AND take a nap at the same time.

I went to give plasma.

I have never given plasma. I called to find out where the clinic was and said, "you cant be serious." It was in the shadiest shopping center in town, and was next to a bowling alley.

I walked in.

It was packed with people. All sorts of people. They did a bunch of tests on me to make sure I didn't have AIDS, and other bad things in me. I had to read so many release forms, that I began to think I had AIDS, along with several other diseases.

The nurse asked me questions.

She said the questions so fast that I didn't really have time to think about what she was saying. So i just kept saying "no." That seemed to be the answer she was looking for.

I walked back into a room. A large room with about 50 reclined chairs full of people. It looked crazy. I sat down and they told me some more information really fast, and the machine started going. I was told if a red light came on, that it meant my blood stopped flowing. They told me to raise my hand. I wasnt sure I would be alive if my blood stopped flowing.

In walked a rather attractive girl. She had a liberty shirt on. She sat down the aisle from me. We would make awkward eye contact because we had no choice. When you sit in a chair for four hours, you are bound to look at the people around you.

My plasma bottle was half full. Im so optimistic.

Plasma girl. That was her name. Almost positive.

I started seeing in quadruple vision. There were several points where I was cold and hot at the same time and I could feel the blood being pumped back into my body. My feet went numb.

After it was over, I collected my handsome reward.

I will go back Tuesday.